A Few Words About Our Ferienwohnung

1. Ferienwohnung literally means holiday apartment, but the German word sounds so much better, I will continue to use it.
2. Ferienwohnung is pronounced “FAIR-ee-in-VOH-nung.”
3. The Ferienwohnung belongs to an elderly couple, whose pleasantness and helpfulness are so genuine that I never had the feeling it was a professional customer service. There are several Ferienwohnungen in their house, here in Serfaus, Austria – a resort town in the Alps. Every day, our hosts work to keep the back yard pristine.
4. The back yard includes a well-behaved lawn, a vegetable garden, a flower garden and a small goldfish pond.
5. My daughter loves the little goldfish pond, and we visit it every morning. There’s also a statue of a little boy holding his hands out. My daughter feeds the little boy by putting clovers in his hands and refers to him as “Boob.” Please be advised that “Boob” is southern German slang for “little boy.” If you are the parent of a little boy, I apologize in advance if my daughter calls him Boob.
6. Our Ferienwohnung house is one of many, all over town and up and down our particular street. Each of them are in good condition and, presumably, making money, and there are cranes here building more. I detect no sense of bitterness or competition between the house-owners. Indeed, while visiting Boob, my daughter and I got to know the man who owns the house next door. He invited us to use there swing, and we took him up on it. Every morning, after we visit Boob, my daughter and I hop the wooden fence to use the neighbor’s swing.
7. Our Ferienwohung itself is on the bottom floor of the house, but that doesn’t matter, because it’s easy for us to get to the garden (to visit Boob), and all of our windows face the valley to give us a majestic view of the Alps.
8. Speaking of windows, the one downside to our Ferienwohnung is that this is the first German house I’ve been to without Rolladen (or roller blinds, but the German word is better), or at least very dark curtains. Our curtains are sufficient for modesty but useless against the summer sun, and useless for a napping 1 and a half year old. The solution? We put her pack’n’play inside the bathroom and hung our picnic blanket over the window, the only window small enough for our picnic blanket. She’s sleeping peacefully as I write this. Thankfully, the toilet is in a different room.
9. The Ferienwohnung has a dishwasher. Hallelujah.
10. The Ferienwohnung has a flat screen TV with digital cable, so we are not missing the Women’s World Cup.
11. The digital cable package includes two embarrassing Evangelical channels, a German one and an American one. The American one showed a prosperity gospel preacher in the morning, and in the evening showed a concert featuring Michael Tait, formerly of DC Talk (where’s he been?). I did not watch much of either. The German evangelical channel is much more subdued and features elderly people talking about spiritual matters, as well as nature scenes and piano muzak in the background.
12. There are also several channels that primarily feature German folk music. Think lederhosen, oompa bands and liter biers. I think elderly people in Germany watch these channels the same way my grandmother would always watch Lawrence Welk reruns.
13. Other channels produce "Schlager" Music. Schlager music is the music of choice for German beer halls since the 70s. Schlager combines German folk music, disco and Tom Jones for a sound that makes you want to drink more. I saw a schlager singer with the combined powers of Luke Skywalker's hair Clark Gable's mustache.
    
14. We’re saving money by not using the Internet. This is a forced fast, and not only do I feel very uninformed, but my hands are beginning to shake.
15. The furniture, from bed to wardrobe, is firm, comfortable and of excellent quality.
16. All in all, this is a comfortable place to return and reflect. Beauty and nature mean processing. I do this better when I turn off the television and sit where I can look one direction to see my wife and another direction to look out the window for an awe-inspiring view of the Alps. Why look elsewhere?